Thursday 19 February 2009

Contented Mum's Enlightenment

You may have noticed (or not) the lack of articles yesterday. Contented mum had a day off and spent it with family and friends, away from home. My daughter is luckier than she'll ever know as she has numerous Aunties and Uncles plus both sets if Grandparents.

The first day in a new environment was slightly unsettling for her. There are opinions that babies feed off the mother's moods so it's likely she sensed that I was out of my usual habitat. That is no way a slight on my hosts, they've made their home as comfortable as can be. Whichever way you look at it, I'm away from home and needed to adjust. It wasn't any surprise that my daughter was slightly clingy for the first few days.

In terms of responsibility, continuously having to channel your moods, is awesome. That is one of the many aspects of parenting where you are putting your needs before theirs i.e. there's no real scope for you 'not to be in the mood' at any given time. This is not to he confused with being over sensitive to her needs which I have also done. I've spent hours and hours analysing her behaviour to try and see if I could have done anything different. I've since realised that can be a complete waste of time and counter productive as it increases my stress levels.

So it boils down to where to strike the balance? Which again, thinking about excessively can be rather confusing. I have found taking each day at a time has worked for me. It's completely against my nature being a planner and a control freak. The amazing thing is that is why motherhood had been good for my health. I've learned to only worry about things that truly matter plus understand how to be more relaxed when weighing up the consequences of my actions.

That was something I never imagined to happen. I was so preoccupied with maintaining my previous identity I never considered how much of a better person being a mother has made me feel. Don't get me wrong, I'm not in any way suggesting you need to become a parent to realize this. It was something that happened to me personally. Many people achieve this level of enlightenment through other, less drastic means.

I will probably need to revisit this blog when I go back to work. It's one thing to take things day by day while I'm off full time but throw work into the mix and it will be back to the drawing board. Lucky baby, dad and I have the support network of the family less challenging.

Contented mum over and out.


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